One of the hardest things for me to do in early recovery, was allowing myself to become vulnerable. I had been hurt so many times, real or imagined, I feared allowing some one into my safe place. I found out that that fear could be turned to faith. I think the biggest lesson was learning to not give up my power and allowing people to control my life. Because I wanted you to like me, I didn't want to say NO or disagree with you, and many times I gave them the authority, not honouring my own truth and my God.
My heart took a lot to heal. Took a long time to trust. My sponsor said to me, "Just because someone is in the rooms, doesn't mean their truth is yours." Acknowledge and accept that they can speak their truth, you don't have to accept it for yourself.
We are all human. We are all in different places in our recovery, and it is good to keep an open mind. I love the hymn that is quoted, one of the many that was a part of my life, and when I am troubled in today, one will pop into my mind and I find myself walking down the street, sitting in my part, and I will break into song. It is generally those old one I learned in a country gospel hall, all very basic, and the Gospel Halls were the same format as AA. I think that is why I felt comfortable. There is no minister, priest, or leader, just a group of elders.
Count your blessings, if you look closer, there may be more there than you think.
