December 16

I had an easy life growing up. I was not serious, and I'm trying to make up for it now.
-- Tom Harding

How we define an easy life may differ because everything is relative. Some of us were raised in prosperous homes, which might have meant we weren't required to seek work or do chores around the house. But that kind of privilege didn't guarantee an easy life. Wealth doesn't eliminate the possibility for abuse of many forms.

To some, the easy life simply means there was little stress, few problems to contend with. Parents were supportive; school work came easy; friends really cared about us. Maybe we feel lucky if that's how our lives evolved, or maybe we are like Tom and feel now that we need to make up for our lives of privilege. Let's seek the counsel of others if that's the case. It's okay to have had the easy route. That doesn't mean we have to pay for it now.

The important element is that we spend the present however we really want to. If we want to be more serious, that's acceptable. If we want to be lazy, that's okay too. If we want to have a positive impact on someone else's life, perhaps someone who had a harder life than we experienced, that's admirable, but not necessary. No one is grading us.

Today I'm free. The past isn't of concern unless I make it so.

You are reading from the book:

Keepers of the Wisdom by Karen Casey

December 17

It is only with the heart that one can see rightly....
--Antoine de Saint Exupery

If we look at the world through suspicious or angry eyes, we'll find a world that mirrors our expectations -- a world where tension will mount, arguments will abound, strife will be present where none need be. However, our experiences in some manner bless us, and we'll recognize that if we look upon them with gratitude. Everything in our path is meant for our good and we'll see the good when our hearts act as the eyes for our minds.

When we see with our hearts, our responses to the turmoil around us, the fighting children, the traffic snarls, the angry lovers, will be soft acceptance. When our hearts guide the action we can accept those things we cannot change, and change those we can. And the heart, as the seat of all wisdom, will always know the difference.

You are reading from the book:

Worthy of Love by Karen Casey

December 18

Competing with others - Attitude

Some of us never liked close competition. We preferred to be clear winners or not to compete at all. We didn't like to have competitors breathing down our necks.

This attitude kept up from doing our best, and we made a mistake when we thought we were competing with others. We're actually competing with ourselves at all times, trying to do better than we did yesterday. The presence of other people only helps us to set performance standards and goals.

Once we accept the idea of self-improvement, we can delight in competition. We can take satisfaction in situations where, though we were not number one, we came in a close second instead of a sullen last.

I'll know today that I'm always working with others but only competing against myself.

You are reading from the book:

Walk in Dry Places by Mel B.

December 19

The feeling of belonging is a gift.

The feeling of belonging - knowing that we have a place - is one of the most important gifts that two partners can give to each other. When we agree to commit ourselves to a partnership, we give each other the key to our daily lives. We allow our mate to be there with us in a way we would not let others. That means that we can expect to have a place that does not have to be renegotiated every day. This feeling of belonging is a gift, but it must be received. In essence, we say to our partner, "I take my place here in your life because we have our relationship. I will relax. I don't stand at the door and knock. We have already told each other that we are included in each other's lives."

This sense of belonging stands in sharp contrast to those feelings of isolation and alienation that we can feel in so many ways. It does not mean that one partner owns the other or that no boundary or separateness exists. But the joy of connection frees people in relationships to fulfill themselves and carry on their lives while in the close comfort of one they love.

Tell your partner how you know you have a place in her or his life.

You are reading from the book:

The More We Find In Each Other by Merle Fossum and Mavis Fossum

December 20

Inspiration starts in the home.
--Alpha English

What does being inspired really mean? Alpha would say it means having the faith to tackle difficult tasks. She surely had it. In a time when few women went to college, she did and with honors. Then after a lifetime of teaching in a small Arkansas town, she began writing plays and a history of African Americans for the benefit of young and old alike. She was inspired. Her example inspired others, too.

But what if we didn't grow up in a home where inspiration was nurtured? Did that mean we couldn't develop it? Taking notice of how we have solved problems and approached the unknown in our lives indicates the level of inspiration we acquired from somewhere. What's obvious is that we did create it somehow. Any accomplishment we can point to is evidence. Nobody tackles anything without some inner drive that says they can. That's inspiration.

Some of us did have more than others. Some of us still do. The good news is that we can "trade" inspiration with each other. We can give it away when a friend is in need, and we can borrow it back when we're feeling uncertain about a direction or a task. It matters not where we get it. It never did. It was simply easier for us if it was one of the gifts passed on in our homes.

My inspiration can come from anywhere today. Those who are closest are the obvious "carriers."

You are reading from the book:

Keepers of the Wisdom by Karen Casey

December 21

History books begin and end, but the events they describe do not.
--R. G. Collingwood

Each day we turn a new page in our recovery, and we grow more settled in our new life. As we learn to live in the present, neither fearing the future not feeling shame about the past, we discover new pleasures in simply living. We don’t have to hide our fear any more, we don’t have to suppress grief or shame or anger. We don’t have to keep our real selves secret behind a veil of chemicals.

But we do need to remember. Our old behavior is still a part of us. We may still be paying the consequences for it, with legal or health problems. We may still feel remorse over our actions. And we need to remember that our addiction did not end simply because we stopped using our drug of choice. We could relapse at any time if we aren’t careful and don’t work our program. We could replace our old addictive behaviors at any time with equally unhealthy new ones that may be harder for us to see. This is why we keep going to meetings. This is why we need our sponsor, our other program friends, and our Higher Power. Recovery is active. When we are working at it, we are recovering.

Today help me see what work I need to do for my recovery.

You are reading from the book:

Body, Mind, and Spirit by Anonymous

December 22

Live and let live is good advice.

The more comfortable we are with the knowledge that each of us has a unique journey to make, a specific purpose to fulfill, the easier it is to let other people live their own lives. When family members are in trouble with alcohol or other drugs, it's terribly difficult to let them have their own journey. Because we love them, we feel compelled to help them get clean and sober. In reality, all we can do is pray for their safety and well-being. Their recovery is up to them and their Higher Power.

For some of us it's a leap of faith to believe there really is a Divine plan of which we are all a part. And perhaps it's not even necessary to believe. But we'll find the hours of every day gentler if we accept that a Higher Power is watching over all of us.

Being able to let others live and learn their own lessons is one of our lessons. The more we master it, the more peaceful we'll be.

I have enough to do just living my life today. I can let others do what they must.

You are reading from the book:

A Life of My Own by Karen Casey

December 23

I alone can do it. But I can't do it alone.
--Anonymous

We're the luckiest people alive because we don't have to do anything alone! Whether we have a new assignment to tackle, a new relationship to cultivate, a new boss to please, we'll never fail as long as we rely on the program, our sponsors, and our Higher Power.

That doesn't mean we won't have trying times and some failures. But the companionship we need for handling the difficult periods will never be denied us. Perhaps we think it will. Maybe that's why we try to do too much alone.

We didn't end up in this Twelve Step program as the result of living peaceful, productive lives. We're here because we got scared. Our lives weren't working. And they won't work now if we insist on doing it alone. This is our second chance. Let's take it.

I will seek the support I need from friends and God today. I'll have a good day because of this.

You are reading from the book:

A Woman's Spirit by Karen Casey

December 24

The body repeats the landscape. They are the source of each other and create each other.
--Meridel Le Sueur

The beautiful correspondences that structure the world - from the five pointed star in the core of the apple to the snail shell spiral of our inner ear - can be a source of great comfort to us. When we feel most alone, most abandoned and out of sorts, the simple forms of beauty can remind our eyes of the world's unity and our place within it.

Our path through the world is a part of it. We add our individual voices to the chord that is language, that is history. No matter how desperate we may feel, or how hopeless our lives may seem at times, the fact remains that loss and sorrow are a part of life, and the law of life is change. Unless we choose to cling to sorrow, it will flow through us. The next wave of feeling may bring us joy.

The hexagonal cells of the honeycomb recall the shapes of insects' eyes, snowflakes, geodesic domes. We fit into this grand design. We're here for a reason - for many reasons. Let us treat ourselves as gently as we try to treat the other parts of the delicate web of life.

I stand in a reciprocal relationship with the world, part of it as it is part of me.

You are reading from the book:

The Promise of a New Day by Karen Casey and Martha Vanceburg

December 25

To him, it was not the gift that mattered, but the giver.
--Walter de La Mare

In our material world today, we often get off track. We forget that what we really need in our lives is love and close friendships. It's too easy to take our relationships for granted. It's also too easy to take our sobriety for granted - the big gift of another chance at life.

For Christians, today marks the birth of Christ, the child who came to bring love and forgiveness to all. Whether we are Christian or not, as recovering people, we know that love and forgiveness do open the gates to new life. When we live in the light of our Higher Power - whether we call that power Jesus, Yahweh, Muhammad, Buddha, or Creator - we find ourselves living that new life.

Let each of us, in the name of our own Higher Power; spend this day in celebration of the new life we have been given.

Prayer for the Day

Higher Power, thanks for delivering new light into my life and giving me another chance. Teach me to live in the light of love and forgiveness. What a gift.

Today's Action

What gifts of love and forgiveness can I deliver to others today? What can I give from my heart that will bring someone light and joy? A smile and a hug? A phone call? An afternoon of conversation and play? I will remember to contact my sponsor today.

You are reading from the book:

God Grant Me... by Anonymous

December 26

Fear No More

I will not fear those who have hurt me,
For You have given me power.
I shall sleep without nightmares;
You have given me peace.
I shall awaken with a clear and rested mind;
You have given me clarity.
I shall start my day happy, joyous, and free;
You have given me my recovery;
You have given me a new life.
For Your grace,
I will demonstrate my gratitude
In useful and positive action
Throughout this day.

You are reading from the book:

The 12 Step Prayer Book Volume 2 by Bill P. and Lisa D.

December 27

Taking the first step helps bridge the gulf between our dreams and our accomplishments.

Whether the project is cleaning the garage, building a cathedral, or recovering from an addiction, plans must be translated into action. In order to arrive at our destination, we must begin the trip. We can read hundreds of college catalogs, but it's when we register for a course, buy a textbook, and begin to study that we are on our way to a degree.

Two factors inhibit our beginning a project. The first is lack of clear motivation, and the second is fear of failure. If we don't really want to do something, it's hard to get started. So, if motivation is a problem, we may need to reconsider our choice of projects.

As for fear of failure, this may be something that we step over and around as we move forward. It is not a good reason for aborting a dream. If, in spite of fear of failure, we make a beginning, we will find that the fear shrinks with every step we take. Action is the catalyst. We learn how to do something by doing it.

I will take the first step toward accomplishing a dream today by getting started.

You are reading from the book:

Inner Harvest by Elisabeth L.

December 28

Over the years, my brothers and sisters have brought out the best and the worst in me.
--Sam Friend

It sometimes seems that our parents love our brothers and sisters more than they love us. Being jealous of a brother or sister is often a confusing kind of jealousy. One minute we hate them and the next we love them.

Forgiving seems impossible at times. We wonder how Mom and Dad can be so nice to them. We think our parents don't see their true sides. We may feel like we get blamed for everything in the family while our brothers and sisters are praised.

Resentment is often hard to let go of. It is easier if we remember that we are the only ones hurt by hanging on to them.

Today let me be willing to let go of one resentment so I can benefit from a more comfortable sobriety.

You are reading from the book:

Our Best Days by Nancy Hull-Mast

December 29

You have to sniff out joy, keep your nose to the joy-trail.
--Buffy Sainte-Marie

Newcomer

I heard an old-timer say, "You can be right, or you can be happy." What does that mean? When something is wrong, am I supposed to deny what I can see with my own eyes?

Sponsor

This program saying is not meant to encourage stupidity or moral laziness. It's an affectionate way of suggesting that when we obsess about our own point of view or insist on having our own way, we may have our priorities mixed up. It suggests that we be open-minded and tolerant of people with whom we may disagree. It reminds us that self-will is not the path to serenity.

It also suggests that we have a choice about where to focus our mental energies. There is nothing wrong with having our own particular point of view and confidently and persuasively expressing it – that's part of our self-esteem. But we don't have to win arguments and attempt to force people and situations to conform to our own ideas. We can detach from the argument, instead of reacting. We can experience the peace that comes from letting go, as we cultivate mental relaxation and serenity as tools of our recovery.

Today, I don't have to be right. I'm happy, as I live and let live.

You are reading from the book:

If You Want What We Have by Joan Larkin

December 30

Serenity = Reality = Inner peace and strength.
--Anonymous

Most of us chased an elusive thing called serenity for years. We thought our journeys outside reality brought us peace and serenity. When we returned to reality we found harshness and pain that caused us to run back to using. So it went, day after day, week after week, month after month, year after year. Run, escape, pain; run, escape, pain.

Then something happened. Our addiction wouldn't let us escape anymore. We no longer found what we were seeking. We tried using more heavily. Finally, all that was left of our lives was the pain.

The Fellowship shows us that reality is not a problem. Trying to escape reality is a problem. When we continue to turn our wills and lives over to a Higher Power, the serenity that results creates a reality of inner peace and strength.

I trust and believe that the changes I am going through in my recovery are necessary and good for me.

You are reading from the book:

Easy Does It by Anonymous